It's so important to engage in advance planning – spelling out your end-of-life and funeral wishes for those who will care for you as you die and plan your remembrances. This is a gift to your survivors and also a gift to yourself, saving others decision making at a difficult time and ensuring that your choices are honored as much as is possible. You can actually take this a step further, if there is an emergency and someone must step in and act for you during an expected (or unexpected) hospitalization or another event that renders you unable to act for yourself. From someone paying your bills to those who care for your pets, a "Book of Answers" helps those taking care of you while you can't care for yourself keep your life running smoothly until you are ready to jump back in.  As you do your advance planning (see our Good Death series), consider enlarging your scope to cover unexpected emergencies as well.

Creating and Assembling your Book of Answers

You can use a binder (probably the easiest way to organize this information), an online document, or a file folder to compile instructions and resources for those who need to step in for you. A binder is ideal because you can purchase a bright color (like red, so it's very noticeable) and create section dividers. Alternatively, an online document saved to the cloud and shared with those you trust (through a service like 1Password, Box or Dropbox) also works. The key is to gather everything in one place and let those who will be acting for you – such as your Power of Attorney, or even a neighbor or relative – know where it is. Once you've decided on the format and location, and who you want to share it with, you can begin to compile your resource.

What to Include

Although you can certainly separate instructions for after-death care and care while you are still alive into different binders or files, it makes sense to keep everything together in one place. If there are documents you don't feel comfortable including, such as a will or a power of attorney, you can create a sheet of paper that says, "My will lives in the law office of X," and include that attorney's contact information. If and when your executor/power of attorney needs to access those legal documents, they'll know exactly how to do so.

To start, create the following sections, and include the relevant information:

Legal documents: will, power of attorney, healthcare proxy, advance directive, or information on how to access them.

Household information: names/address of all properties you own or rent, utility account numbers, insurance information, tax amounts and due dates, handypersons you have used in the past, your preferred plumber and electrician. If you live in or own a condo or coop, include the management company contact information.

Healthcare information: copy of your health insurance card, names and contact information of your doctors, hospitals where you have been treated, and medications you take.

Pet Care Information: names/ages of your pets, your veterinarian's contact information, medications they take, and dog walkers/cat sitters. If you regularly meet people at a dog park for your dog to play with friends, consider including this information. This way, whoever is caring for your pet can maintain your dog's routine and keep your dog park friends updated on your situation. People care, and will want to be kept in the loop, especially if they see you regularly in a social situation like this. It may pay to leave a small amount of cash for their care. It is presumptuous to assume that someone stepping in to care for your pet has spare funds. You can also leave your credit card number with your vet and set up automatic shipments of your pet’s preferred food and any medications they take.

Emergency contact information:  names, emails, and telephone numbers of anyone you would want informed of an emergency that takes you out of your regular routine. This can be friends, relatives, bosses, therapists, your yoga studio or personal trainer (if you attend regularly), your door attendant, cleaning person, etc. Not only does this ensure that others know why you are not around, but it will also save you a lot of explaining when you return. If you are active in a house of worship, include this information as well. It is also good to elucidate precisely what information can be shared by your emergency contacts. For instance, if you would like your congregation to know that you are ill so they can reach out to your family, leave this instruction for your clergyperson.

Any other relevant financial information, such as when your bills are due and how they are paid, can save time/hassle during periods of incapacitation and when you return to everyday life. For instance, have you set up automatic bill pay for your cable and electric bills? Do you pay your credit cards from paper statements with a check? Many utility companies will allow you to designate an individual they can share information with in case of emergency, so ask about this and give them that information (perhaps it's your power of attorney or someone else). Same with your bank, although for continuity, it's best to have your POA as the contact person in these situations.

Bank account information:  this may be information you keep at your attorney's office or other secure location for your power of attorney. If they have to step in and pay your bills, they'll need to know where and how to access funds. If you have a financial advisor, be sure to inform them of the name and contact info for your POA, and make sure your POA has their contact information as well.  Include investment accounts, retirement accounts, 529 or other college savings plans, etc.

Once you've put all this information together, be sure to tell those who'll need to step in exactly where your Book of Answers lives. This will be a huge relief to anyone who has to act for you – in any capacity, at any time. An emergency doesn't need to be death or a serious illness; it could be that you are delayed getting home from a long trip, or even that you are leaving town for a significant amount of time and want to be sure you're covered for anything that happens while you are away. Just like your end-of-life planning, this resource will be a gift to others as well as to yourself, making it easier for others to help you and creating peace of mind for yourself!

August 2025